A Leading International Spokesman for Love and Romance

windupkitty
Submitted by windupkitty April 9th, 2010
Certifikitsch Winner

Clearly. This movie is the closet competition for ipecac I have ever seen. It’s a brilliant party movie, and usually inspires monumental amounts of laughter, but is so cringe-worthy that often, people truly can not stand it. The last time I played it with a few people over, I heard, from the kitchen (a few feet from the living room), pterodactyl-like screeches and things like “NO! MAKE IT STOP!”.

“There is a time for honor, a time for innocence and a time for romance” (That’s actually trademarked). Was Fabio’s time for innocence cut short by his discovery that it really wasn’t butter? Even big strong, minotaurs like Fabio have their dreams crushed!

OK, I HAVE to include the liner notes on the back. Because you won’t believe them:

“Never before has the passion and timeless magic of historical romance been faithfully captured by the screen until now. A TIME FOR ROMANCE ™ is a breathtaking new film of romantic adventure, intrigue, and sensuality featuring one of the hottest new stars of the nineties, Fabio. A leading international spokesman for love and romance, Fabio has been chosen by millions of women worldwide as the personification of their ideal man. (I can barely keep typing at this point, mind you!) Now, in three very special fantasies, Fabio makes every woman’s dream come true.

CONQUEST OF THE VIKING: (I’m not freaking kidding!)Savor the thrill of Fabio as a viking warrior who plans to conquer more than just England…….

THE PIRATE ROGUE: Experience the playful side of Fabio as a pirate captain who uncovers a treasure he hasn’t counted on…..

DREAM LOVER: Enjoy the intrigue of the mysterious with Fabio as a 1930s Italian Count who finds himself far from home……

This extraordinary film delivers all the excitement, the danger, and the charm that have marked him as the world’s sexiest man and have made Fabio the first name in romance.”

You bet.

7 Responses to “A Leading International Spokesman for Love and Romance”

  1. Allee Willis

    Allee Willis

    HOW ON EARTH DID I MISS THIS MOVIE???! I have a box somewhere with a bunch of romance novels Fabio graced the cover on but I don’t think I ever knew that he made this film. This is an absolute must-see!

    Thanks for including some of the liner notes. On movies this bad liner notes are like popcorn adding to the experience.

    I sat at a table in a restaurant next to Fabio about a year ago. I will never forgive myself for not going up to him and asking to take a photo. I pride myself on actually knowing most of the people I take photos with but should have made an exception in this case. His hair was more brunette than blonde. He was with a whole table of women, perhaps costars of this film.

  2. windupkitty

    windupkitty

    “Never before has the passion and timeless magic of historical romance ” this just sounds like it is some sort of poor translation that should be printed on the paper wrapping of a pair of chopsticks….

    Wow, you saw Fabio and he was at a table full of women. That’s just confusing to me!

    My only Fabio story is second hand. I have cousin who is a beautiful as she is brilliant,talented and creative (which is saying A LOT). In the early 90s, she was in Italy working as a model and Fabio actually hit on her. She said he was so very confident in his “power to inspire women” that is was pretty much the funniest thing she has ever experienced. She literally burst out laughing, right in his face, and kept apologizing to him, but couldn’t help herself! LIke I said, she’s cool.

    Oh yeah, you have to see it….it will be coming your way soon…….

  3. Douglas Wood

    Douglas Wood

    Somehow this one passed me by too, but I’m now determined to get my hands on one. If it’s cringe-worthy, I’m there. I guess Fabio is a true movie star– he even gets his name above the title.

  4. denny

    denny

    No, HOW DID I miss this. I used to buy everything on the “Good TImes” label. THis is all kinds of wrong and again, I am almost spit my coffee.Makes me think of the time Fabio got hit in the head with a goose while riding a roller coaster. Poor Fabio. Kooky, your good, I was going to post that video but you beat me to it! Have a great day everyone!