How to record a disco single with a little help from my friends

Gilles Snowcat
Submitted by Gilles Snowcat September 25th, 2009
Certifikitsch Winner

Dear friends,

this is my confession.

Some weeks ago, I was lazily listening to the radio, when I heard the German band Randy Pie playing a song with a title that would have pleased our friend Allee Willis =>

rp-kitsch

But suddenly, horrible crackling noises came from the loudspeaker! I looked behind the radio and oh! =>

em84-kitty

Yeah, a Cat (Hello Kitschty) was stealing a vacuum tube! She chose the Magic Eye tube EM84, “because it’s green and shining“, she said. She might have some kitsch blood in her veins.

The radio providing no sound anymore, I took it as a sign: I had to go back to playing music and record a new single, that would be a big hit everywhere. Planning to turn on my (fake) Stratocaster, I first picked-up my mediator… =>

kittyfender

But when I was about to take my guitar to show the world that somehow I might be the reincarnation of Roland Bautista, what a surprise: ‚Äòsomeone’ was already playing =>

fenderkitty

(Look carefully at the picture, that’s what we call “unplugged”)

OK, ok, dear Cats, keep on playing. I changed my mind: my new single will be only keyboards-oriented. When I was about to plug my old string machine, I feel an eye staring at me. “Stalker?! Stalker?! Who are you?“. I turn on the light and ouch! A big big cat is sitting at my keyboard, looking at me in a menacing way that only the pic below can describe =>

kitty-eye

I ask her if I can play, the answer comes as no surprise: “No way!”

Me: -How can I record my single?

The Cat: -You don’t.

Me: -…?

The Cat: -…!

Me: -But‚Ķ the fans can’t wait!

The Cat: -OK. I record it by myself.

Me: -…?

The Cat: -…!

I knew I had no choice. This would be the next Milli Vanilli scandal, Gilles Snowcat doesn’t play on his records, he has ghost players named Hello Kitty, I can already imagine the disappointed fans. But Kittychan is strict as hell.

Guided by a little friend of hers, she started playing =>

bigkittykbds3

Arranging, finding new chords…

bigkittykbds2

Me: -Write a good song then!

The Cat: -Don’t worry, dude, my friends call me Allee Willis, Jon Lind, Martin Page, Bill Meyers, Tony Banks, Mozart…!

Me: -Allee Willis? Give me kitsch sounds too!

The Cat: -Take the MT32!

Gosh, the MT32 is currently being decorated by another Cat. She puts stickers of herself on my good ol’ sound module!

mt32-kitty

Me: -Well, well, I want the single to be disco, let’s put the rhythm on! Can anyone turn the drummachine on?

The Cat: -No need, I’ll play the drums. My friends call me Keith Forsey! =>

littledrummer-kitty

And when I ask for some more synthesizers, guess who help me? The Cats! Again. =>

mks30kitty

So, finally, I could release my disco single. Kitsch, have you said kitsch? =>

blue-hanger-front

Well, I have a secret to share with you. Sure the Cats played all, but they made such a mess that I had to ask my friend the Bear (Kuma san) to play some overdubs.=>

kuma-aud

But don’t tell the Cats, they would get easily angry if they knew! And when they’re angry, how frightening they turn out to be. =>

shine

Good night everybody.

Gilles

www.awaken.be (Magnetic Soul ~ Love Music)

5 Responses to “How to record a disco single with a little help from my friends”

  1. Allee Willis

    Allee Willis

    Well, an A+++++ for effort here as well as giving the awmok.com interface a supreme workout re length of submission and multiple photos. Thank you, beta testers Giles and H. Kitty! You know I like anybody who stretches creativity to the bare edges of sanity. H. Kitty is indeed a lucky gal to be under your watch. A CertifiKitsch of AuthenKitschy for effort alone!

    • Gilles Snowcat

      Gilles Snowcat

      I accept the CertifiKitsch of AuthenKitschy with great pride, Allee. I’d like to stick it on my wall but ‘could it be right?’ In fact, I’m afraid the Cats would tag some graffiti on the precious paper. Let’s not blame them, they have their own way to ‘let [their] feelings show’. So, instead of a paper, can you write the CertifiKitsch ‘in the stone’? After all, ‘we’re living in our own time’.

  2. Gilles Snowcat

    Gilles Snowcat

    I accept the CertifiKitsch of AuthenKitschy with great pride, Allee. I’d like to stick it on my wall but ‘could it be right?’ In fact, I’m afraid the Cats would tag some graffiti on the precious paper. Let’s not blame them, they have their own way to ‘let [their] feelings show’. So, instead of a paper, can you write the CertifiKitsch ‘in the stone’? After all, ‘we’re living in our own time’.