Free beef w/tire purchase

Cheetah Velour
Submitted by Cheetah Velour August 4th, 2010
Certifikitsch WinnerClassique d Camembert

My mom recently bought some new tires at one of the big tire chains (with “400 store locations throughout the Western United States”) and brought home this fabulous gift with purchase!

Lucky for me, mom didn’t want this and insisted that I take it. Mom knows what I like. The tire place I usually go to only offers free tire rotation. FREE BEEF, though?? Who thought of this promotion and WHY? Would this make you pick one tire chain over the other?

Wait ’til you see what’s inside!

Summer Sausage, which is like the Christmas sweater of meats. Like the bad toupee of meats. Like the polyester of meats.

I CANNOT WAIT TO EAT THIS.

3 Responses to “Free beef w/tire purchase”

  1. Allee Willis

    Allee Willis

    This is such a great promotional tie-in and your narration is fabulous so for this I am awarding you a Classique De Camembert, AWMOK’s highest honor!! How completely insane is it to link tires, easily one of the filthiest objects on earth once they’re driven, to food? And then it’s summer sausage and jerky. What does that say about the tires? Let alone how proud Les Schwab Tires is of their campaign and generous offer of some cheap “FREE BEEF”?!